The newlyweds spent another two days in Chicago, sight seeing by day, long leisurely dinners in the evening, and quiet lovemaking at night. Hal was gentle and patient with Tammy. He never made the connection that it was his profession that caused Tammy’s reticence in bed, he assumed it was his age. Tammy loved Hal for many reasons, but even with her previous non-existent experience, Hal seemed a little unimaginative in that department. But it was mainly the dead who seemed to follow him everywhere that she couldn’t get past. She was careful with his feelings and would never tell him that it was his work that put her off. Because, really, what could he do about it?
They settled into their quiet new life upon returning to Chanceville. Tammy, who had been raised by a very superstitious mother and grandmother, was always on edge in their home/funeral home. It didn't feel like she and Hal lived there alone. It seemed the dead not only followed Hal, they followed her. The whole place was filled with spirits and chatter. Even when she played Hal’s stuffy old classical music loudly, it still didn’t drown out the ghostly conversations.
Hal was always busy with work and his community activities so Tammy started spending more and more time in the Wax Museum. The wax figures were so poorly rendered that they weren’t life-like enough to be creepy to her, closer to comically misshapen. If you put a Nazi uniform on Charlie Chaplin, you suddenly had Adolf Hitler. Which, theoretically, doubled their inventory; all they had to do with most of them was change their costumes. Hal had proudly told her that the wax museum had been his mother’s life work. Tammy didn’t believe that the oddities of the figures were from lack of talent, but a reflection of her mother-in-law’s worldview. Fuzzy at best.
Hal’s mother, Peggy Hendricks, was currently residing at the Sally Forth Home for the Elderly and Infirm. Owned and run by former exotic dancer, Sally Forth. Hal and Tammy visited her every Sunday after church. They used to take her out for a meal, but Peggy kept trying to go back to the kitchen at the Tip Topp diner, thinking she should be cooking Sunday dinner. They began stopping by the diner on the way and brought chicken dinners for the three of them.
“I don’t think I got a very good do on the mashed potatoes. They seem a little runny,” said Peggy with a mouthful.
Tammy reached over with her napkin and tenderly wiped the old lady’s chin. She reminded Peggy of her own grandmother, chin hairs and all. She wondered if she could tactfully offer to help the old lady with some personal grooming.
“No, Mother,” said Hal. “The meal is perfect, especially the potatoes. Thanks for making them; you know they’re my favorite.”
Mrs. Hendricks smiled a wide baked bean smile at the two of them.
Tammy visited her mother-in-law a couple of days a week. If the old lady was having a good day, Tammy would sign her out and take her back to the Wax Museum. The two of them would putter around in amiable silence as they fussed with the figures. Peggy showed Tammy how to delicately clean the surface of the wax figures without damaging their skin color, which mostly seemed to be tinged with green, giving them all a slightly bilious look.
If Peggy were having a very good day, they would stop at Prissy Paulson’s Try to Measure Up Fabric Shop and buy material to fashion new outfits for some of the wax figures more tattered ensembles. Tammy’s Grandmother Vera had taught her how to sew. She was a firm taskmaster, so everything Tammy sewed was expertly done.
“Now Tammy, always thread your needle from right to left for even hand stitching. If you thread left to right, it will look like the cat sewed it,” said Grandmother Vera. Tammy was never quite sure where her grandmother got these ideas, but she certainly would never have been so rude as to question her beloved grandmother.
She had what, to Tammy, seemed like a million of these superstitious rules for every facet of life. Tammy didn’t like to think she was superstitious herself, but she found that she automatically tried to stem the tide of bad luck and observed rituals that brought good luck to her and those she loved.
One day when Tammy went to pick up Peggy at the Sally Forth Home for the Elderly and Infirm, Peggy seemed really excited to see her.
Before Tammy even got a chance to greet her, Peggy said, “It’s time we spruced up Mrs. Clark, Pioneer Woman. Peggy alternately called Pioneer Woman, Mrs. Clark or Mrs. Lewis. Can we go to the Measure Up Fabric Shop and get some new fabric? I know exactly what I want.”
“Of course, Mother Hendricks. That sounds like fun,” said Tammy.
Peggy already had her jacket on and was in such a hurry to get out the door that she almost knocked Tammy down. As Tammy turned laughing, she, and Peggy tried to get through the door at the same time. They simultaneously snapped their fingers first on the right, then on the left to ward off evil doorway twins, saying be gone Evil Doorway Twins! This time they both burst out laughing, surprised that they knew the same superstition.
When they arrived at the Measure Up, Prissy Paulson greeted them warmly asking what she could do for them on this fine day.
“We want to spruce up our pioneer woman, Mrs. Lewis," said Peggy.
Prissy looked at Tammy and winked. Tammy suppressed
a giggle. It was one of Chanceville’s worst kept secrets that Mrs. Clark/Lewis resembled Mae West, Dance Hall Girl, much more than a hardscrabble, worn out Pioneer Woman.
“We have some new feed sack prints that I think would be just the thing,” said Prissy as she led them to the back of the store.
“That sounds perfect,” said Peggy and Tammy simultaneously.
“Jinx, you owe me a Coke,” said Tammy and Peggy.
Peggy picked out a soft pink and green flowered print for Mrs. Clark/Lewis’ dress and some bright blue sequined rickrack for the trim around the provocatively scooped neckline. Perfect, thought Tammy.
Tammy treated to lunch at the The Tip Topp Diner where she managed to keep Peggy out of the kitchen for once. Then they headed back to the Wax Museum to begin what could possibly be the finest effort of their partnership to date.
